Blogger’s block seems to be my natural state, with some intermittent blogging scattered here and there. Hi!
Nothing remarkable has happened lately, if you discount the fact that I am WORKING. In a MUSEUM. And they PAY me and everything. I have a pension plan. ME. I mean, my day consisted of eating an apple here, reading a book there, watching TV, laughing at the BJP. And I am now in a flatshare, paying RENT. And I cook my own food (or what I call food, my parents beg to differ. Apparently Rajma does not a meal make). I sleep at reasonable hours and cannot actually function anymore with three hours of sleep. I joined the gym (That’s all, I haven’t actually been there after that little walk on the wild side). And I use a washing machine and worry about interest rates. I caught myself thinking of investments the other day. Christ. Dangerous notions need to be quashed at infancy, or I’ll soon be watching Sanskar TV and learning yoga, and then where will we be?
So, besides independent and semi-responsible living 101, what else is up? Nothing much, really. But I did see a guy running past me in Euston station, in trousers three sizes too large, flashing grey underwear. Yes, it was that evident, and yes, it is burnt into my retinas forever. Seriously. If you do need to show everyone your underwear, at least wear interesting ones like those Chandler has in one episode – ones with hearts (yes, again, I have spent years of my life watching Friends. Ask me to quote them. Go on, I dare you.) Or ones with Calvin and Hobbes, or Superman ones. Otherwise, KEEP THE DAMN TROUSERS UP. What will your grandmother think, eh? Heard of something called a belt? Handy things, those.
Oh, did I tell you about the 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle that I did, just to see if I could? It was finished after a lot of stubborn determination that I would not let something called ‘Flower Fairies’ defeat me. I think I might have become slightly more short sighted after that little adventure. It was very satisfying though, I can tell you that. These days, I am flapping around in art shops looking for marble paper (that’s craft paper, non-Indians) to make origami cranes. I learnt how to from someone at work. While I don’t intend to make a Thousand Origami Cranes to make my wishes come true (if I had to wish, I’d probably wish for a thousand of them first, made and delivered to my doorstep), I am contemplating making a few to hang about in my room. That, my friends, is the extent of my arty side. After that I am going to learn how to knit. A sock, anyone? Fun times! I am clearly living life on the edge here people!
This blog post, in case you haven’t already noticed, is not about anything in particular (unlike all my other very focused, profound, thought driven posts). I'm trying to ‘inspire’ myself by actually putting something up, hoping that its ghastliness will scare me into quickly writing something sounding slightly more intelligent and not make my parents wonder where all that money they spent on my education went.
Or I could always go back to watching Vampire Diaries I suppose.
Showing posts with label Life and then some. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life and then some. Show all posts
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Please, Don't Tell Me a Story!
Ideas we are introduced to as children stay with us for life. One's personality is, after all, the result of upbringing, culture and, in the modern world, what the media projects on a daily basis. This is particularly true in the case of notions of gender identity, and the roles and characteristics that society assigns to each – male and female. The third gender is not even considered by society, so let us leave that one for another day.
Consciously or otherwise, society came up with certain ways to, and I do not use this term lightly, brainwash us, about what is appropriate behaviour for different genders. Education, modernity and the feminist movement have challenged the most outrageous of these norms, but many continue to exist. Of course, they vary from culture to culture, but some common factors are present everywhere. Let us look at three of them in this post – two are important influences from our childhood, and one that continues to assault us even after we become adults: toys, fairy tales and television programmes/films.
Toys obviously form an important part of play during childhood. In the beginning, we all get the same things – things that make noise, are bright and move. However, once children become mobile, start talking and become capable of absorbing basic concepts like who those tall people who boss us around are, or why drinking out of the fish tank is not an option, the toys they play with change as well. Out go the rattles and in come the toy soldiers and blonde, blue eyed dolls with vacant expressions. Toy guns and miniature kitchen sets. Doctor kits and mock make-over sets, complete with fake lipsticks, blush and mascara. I read about this bizarre ‘Make your own atomic bomb’ kit that came out during the cold war, which actually included four samples of uranium ore (Gilbert U-238 Atomic Energy Laboratory).
The point of this little toy history is, through them are introduced subtle but clear ideas of what is considered appropriate behaviour and careers for different sexes. Boys need to be tough like soldiers, they should not cry, they should be brave. Girls, lets cook! Let us put on make-up, hang around in the kitchen, drink tea and have unrealistic ideas about what women should look like (If Barbie was human: 37-28-40, 7.8 ft. Really?! What a brilliant role model for inspiring a healthy body image). We outgrow toys at some stage, but the question is, do we outgrow what they try to teach us? Of course, parents may not actually want us to learn these precise ideas from our toys, but some forethought while shopping and gifting would be nice.
The next important factor would be the stories we hear and read as children. “Please tell me a story!” is a line most of us would have said at some point in our childhood. Growing up in Bombay, in a family that considered reading as the best hobby a child could have, I got access to both western fairy tales and Indian mythological stories. Western fairy tales included Grimm’s Fairy Tales, Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, Rapunzel, Snow White, Ugly Duckling and the like, while Indian ones, thanks to Uncle Pai and his Amar Chitra Katha, included stories of Indian kings and mythological heroes. In retrospect, both were sexist as hell.
Among the European fairy tales, almost all had a similar theme running through them – beauty is everything, step mothers are beyond evil, weak women are cool and need to be rescued by Prince Charming. The duckling is shunned till it turns into a swan; the Princess lets the Prince climb up her hair (!), kisses random Princes and frogs, sleeps in strangers houses and lets Prince Charming slay her demons for her. And now, the
Princess has made a comeback in the form of Bella Swan and Twilight (refer to previous post). Grow a backbone, please! These stories give new heights to the more ridiculous ideas of being feminine i.e. be weak and wait to be rescued; simultaneously, they instill completely unrealistic notions about how men should behave. Unconsciously, many women do look out for their Knight in Shining Armour, who, when he comes along, may turn out to be a loser in aluminium foil...(Thank you Facebook, this one is priceless).
As for the Indian stories, don’t even get me started on them – why are almost all the mythological heroes men, and why do women feature as prominent characters only when they are playing mothers or wives to these said heroes? Sorry, I refuse to be the woman behind a successful man. I want to be successful, screw him. And though this is not related to what is being discussed, I would just like to point out that Indian Sultans and Badshahs were not lecherous and evil beings waiting to kill Rajputs and take their women. Bloody Hindu propaganda.
And finally, thank you Ekta Kapoor and co, for depicting women (and only Hindu ones as that, god knows how she would have depicted the Muslim community) as the ever suffering, silent victims of archaic patriarchal traditions. No, no, please do not rebel, do not have a career, worship your mangalsutra and sindoor, have ridiculous names and tolerate your cheating husbands. Yes, that is what all Indian women should aspire to be. A Mrs. Somebody who does not have self respect or an independent mind.
What we need is stories that teach children about independence and self-confidence, emphasise on the importance of inner beauty and loving oneself, and tell them that they can be anything they want to be. Prince Charming can go back to the happy land of singing serfs, benevolent Fairy Godmothers and evil step sisters - we new age women can take care of ourselves.
Consciously or otherwise, society came up with certain ways to, and I do not use this term lightly, brainwash us, about what is appropriate behaviour for different genders. Education, modernity and the feminist movement have challenged the most outrageous of these norms, but many continue to exist. Of course, they vary from culture to culture, but some common factors are present everywhere. Let us look at three of them in this post – two are important influences from our childhood, and one that continues to assault us even after we become adults: toys, fairy tales and television programmes/films.
Toys obviously form an important part of play during childhood. In the beginning, we all get the same things – things that make noise, are bright and move. However, once children become mobile, start talking and become capable of absorbing basic concepts like who those tall people who boss us around are, or why drinking out of the fish tank is not an option, the toys they play with change as well. Out go the rattles and in come the toy soldiers and blonde, blue eyed dolls with vacant expressions. Toy guns and miniature kitchen sets. Doctor kits and mock make-over sets, complete with fake lipsticks, blush and mascara. I read about this bizarre ‘Make your own atomic bomb’ kit that came out during the cold war, which actually included four samples of uranium ore (Gilbert U-238 Atomic Energy Laboratory).
The point of this little toy history is, through them are introduced subtle but clear ideas of what is considered appropriate behaviour and careers for different sexes. Boys need to be tough like soldiers, they should not cry, they should be brave. Girls, lets cook! Let us put on make-up, hang around in the kitchen, drink tea and have unrealistic ideas about what women should look like (If Barbie was human: 37-28-40, 7.8 ft. Really?! What a brilliant role model for inspiring a healthy body image). We outgrow toys at some stage, but the question is, do we outgrow what they try to teach us? Of course, parents may not actually want us to learn these precise ideas from our toys, but some forethought while shopping and gifting would be nice.
The next important factor would be the stories we hear and read as children. “Please tell me a story!” is a line most of us would have said at some point in our childhood. Growing up in Bombay, in a family that considered reading as the best hobby a child could have, I got access to both western fairy tales and Indian mythological stories. Western fairy tales included Grimm’s Fairy Tales, Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, Rapunzel, Snow White, Ugly Duckling and the like, while Indian ones, thanks to Uncle Pai and his Amar Chitra Katha, included stories of Indian kings and mythological heroes. In retrospect, both were sexist as hell.
Among the European fairy tales, almost all had a similar theme running through them – beauty is everything, step mothers are beyond evil, weak women are cool and need to be rescued by Prince Charming. The duckling is shunned till it turns into a swan; the Princess lets the Prince climb up her hair (!), kisses random Princes and frogs, sleeps in strangers houses and lets Prince Charming slay her demons for her. And now, the
Princess has made a comeback in the form of Bella Swan and Twilight (refer to previous post). Grow a backbone, please! These stories give new heights to the more ridiculous ideas of being feminine i.e. be weak and wait to be rescued; simultaneously, they instill completely unrealistic notions about how men should behave. Unconsciously, many women do look out for their Knight in Shining Armour, who, when he comes along, may turn out to be a loser in aluminium foil...(Thank you Facebook, this one is priceless).
As for the Indian stories, don’t even get me started on them – why are almost all the mythological heroes men, and why do women feature as prominent characters only when they are playing mothers or wives to these said heroes? Sorry, I refuse to be the woman behind a successful man. I want to be successful, screw him. And though this is not related to what is being discussed, I would just like to point out that Indian Sultans and Badshahs were not lecherous and evil beings waiting to kill Rajputs and take their women. Bloody Hindu propaganda.
And finally, thank you Ekta Kapoor and co, for depicting women (and only Hindu ones as that, god knows how she would have depicted the Muslim community) as the ever suffering, silent victims of archaic patriarchal traditions. No, no, please do not rebel, do not have a career, worship your mangalsutra and sindoor, have ridiculous names and tolerate your cheating husbands. Yes, that is what all Indian women should aspire to be. A Mrs. Somebody who does not have self respect or an independent mind.
What we need is stories that teach children about independence and self-confidence, emphasise on the importance of inner beauty and loving oneself, and tell them that they can be anything they want to be. Prince Charming can go back to the happy land of singing serfs, benevolent Fairy Godmothers and evil step sisters - we new age women can take care of ourselves.
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Thoughts of a person pretending to be working on her dissertation
A few things that crossed my mind in these past few months:
1: Electronic life: Has anyone else noticed that life today is starting to resemble life depicted in futuristic movies made in the 90s and early 2000s? Tiny USB sticks, tiny computers, touch screen gadgets (remember that fancy computer thing in Minority Report?), voice recognition programmes, electronic.....everything! I find it unnerving sometimes.
The worst - e-books: I tried e-versions of books that I already own in their real format – you know, paper – and I must say, it has none of the charm of reading the actual paper book (describing a book this way is starting to depress me); and worse still has to be those e-book readers that I see everyone carrying on the tube and on buses. I was told that the e-book reader is very convenient – it does store thousands of books and takes up no physical space, just virtual; and the experience can even be real: you can turn pages ‘manually’. Sorry. I think turning e-pages, which are essentially in that format to enhance your experience of using the contraption, and hence are imaginary, is just stupid.
For me, and I agree that this need not be the case for everyone, but for me, the pleasure of reading is the whole experience of it – the act of stepping out of my house to go to a bookstore on a lazy afternoon, browsing, the smell of new books. Going home with the reassuring weight of the new tome in my bag, curling up in an armchair in a corner, and then being oblivious to the world around till someone screams for you to eat something. Funny, witty, pretty, exotic bookmarks holding back a story already read, pointing you to the new world waiting to be discovered. Shutting a finished book with a sigh of satisfaction, and looking down at what now looks like a book that has been read, tiny cracks on the spine, a very faint dog eared appearance. And most importantly: shelving it with other loved and well read volumes, all living together in a space that promises still more undiscovered delights and known comfort. Somehow, I don’t see such an experience being offered by the e-book readers and e-books themselves. Imagine curling up under a blanket with a self lit book that is unyielding in ones hands, and needs to be turned off. Jeez.
Of course, it has its pros, but I still refuse to support it.
2: Obsession with food: While in Bombay, I was and I will be indifferent about food – give me coffee and apples and I will be out of your way for an entire day. However, here in university, where no one makes food that I can eat if and when I feel like it, food has come to occupy a very important place in my life. Days are planned around food. Eating is just the final outcome of a very long and elaborate process - planning a week’s menu, preparing grocery lists, at least two hours of shopping, followed by cooking. What makes everything more interesting is the fact that I am surrounded by friends and flatmates who love food equally – so when we are not eating, we are planning to eat, swapping recipes and trying to get each other to eat. Any visitor or random flatmate entering our kitchen is offered food; a friend who was offered snacks by three different flatmates of mine one evening asked, “why is everyone in this flat trying to feed me?!” We even plan elaborate flat dinners at least once a month; any reason to organise a feast, which lasts for at least a minimum of four hours, with starters, mains and dessert, followed by several rounds of very enthusiastic and sometimes violent UNO. My Facebook account is filled with pictures of food, and then of people eating said food. Happy fattys.
3. Social networking sites: I use Facebook because it allows me to be in touch with 300 people simultaneously, and regularly – no need to write painfully long emails when you can post a hello anytime you fancy. However, when people (no, assassins) offer you weapons in mafia wars, and a friend you swear is an accountant invites you to farm, or when random people send you “gifts” that you don’t get (as that hilarious facebook song goes) you can be justifiably annoyed.
And when one reads newspaper articles, starting with something along the lines of ‘serious charges of corruption were laid against the minister of state’, followed by ‘the minister, however, vehemently denied being involved in the affair when he tweeted....’, one can risk spraining one's neck due to incredulous double takes. Tweet?! Images of a tiny yellow canary with speech impediments flash before my eyes.
This new networking phenomenon has led to people discarding tact and discretion: ‘Just had lunch, yummm’, ‘had a shower’, massive hangover’ and ‘scratched my butt’ are things we really don’t need to know, you know?
Rant ends.
1: Electronic life: Has anyone else noticed that life today is starting to resemble life depicted in futuristic movies made in the 90s and early 2000s? Tiny USB sticks, tiny computers, touch screen gadgets (remember that fancy computer thing in Minority Report?), voice recognition programmes, electronic.....everything! I find it unnerving sometimes.
The worst - e-books: I tried e-versions of books that I already own in their real format – you know, paper – and I must say, it has none of the charm of reading the actual paper book (describing a book this way is starting to depress me); and worse still has to be those e-book readers that I see everyone carrying on the tube and on buses. I was told that the e-book reader is very convenient – it does store thousands of books and takes up no physical space, just virtual; and the experience can even be real: you can turn pages ‘manually’. Sorry. I think turning e-pages, which are essentially in that format to enhance your experience of using the contraption, and hence are imaginary, is just stupid.
For me, and I agree that this need not be the case for everyone, but for me, the pleasure of reading is the whole experience of it – the act of stepping out of my house to go to a bookstore on a lazy afternoon, browsing, the smell of new books. Going home with the reassuring weight of the new tome in my bag, curling up in an armchair in a corner, and then being oblivious to the world around till someone screams for you to eat something. Funny, witty, pretty, exotic bookmarks holding back a story already read, pointing you to the new world waiting to be discovered. Shutting a finished book with a sigh of satisfaction, and looking down at what now looks like a book that has been read, tiny cracks on the spine, a very faint dog eared appearance. And most importantly: shelving it with other loved and well read volumes, all living together in a space that promises still more undiscovered delights and known comfort. Somehow, I don’t see such an experience being offered by the e-book readers and e-books themselves. Imagine curling up under a blanket with a self lit book that is unyielding in ones hands, and needs to be turned off. Jeez.
Of course, it has its pros, but I still refuse to support it.
2: Obsession with food: While in Bombay, I was and I will be indifferent about food – give me coffee and apples and I will be out of your way for an entire day. However, here in university, where no one makes food that I can eat if and when I feel like it, food has come to occupy a very important place in my life. Days are planned around food. Eating is just the final outcome of a very long and elaborate process - planning a week’s menu, preparing grocery lists, at least two hours of shopping, followed by cooking. What makes everything more interesting is the fact that I am surrounded by friends and flatmates who love food equally – so when we are not eating, we are planning to eat, swapping recipes and trying to get each other to eat. Any visitor or random flatmate entering our kitchen is offered food; a friend who was offered snacks by three different flatmates of mine one evening asked, “why is everyone in this flat trying to feed me?!” We even plan elaborate flat dinners at least once a month; any reason to organise a feast, which lasts for at least a minimum of four hours, with starters, mains and dessert, followed by several rounds of very enthusiastic and sometimes violent UNO. My Facebook account is filled with pictures of food, and then of people eating said food. Happy fattys.
3. Social networking sites: I use Facebook because it allows me to be in touch with 300 people simultaneously, and regularly – no need to write painfully long emails when you can post a hello anytime you fancy. However, when people (no, assassins) offer you weapons in mafia wars, and a friend you swear is an accountant invites you to farm, or when random people send you “gifts” that you don’t get (as that hilarious facebook song goes) you can be justifiably annoyed.
And when one reads newspaper articles, starting with something along the lines of ‘serious charges of corruption were laid against the minister of state’, followed by ‘the minister, however, vehemently denied being involved in the affair when he tweeted....’, one can risk spraining one's neck due to incredulous double takes. Tweet?! Images of a tiny yellow canary with speech impediments flash before my eyes.
This new networking phenomenon has led to people discarding tact and discretion: ‘Just had lunch, yummm’, ‘had a shower’, massive hangover’ and ‘scratched my butt’ are things we really don’t need to know, you know?
Rant ends.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
And I now present before you....
Well, the moment I mentioned one in some post, I knew I was dead :P
So, this is a post about my 'bestest' friends - people I have known from school and college. Probably not of interest to those who don't know them, move on to the other posts :)
Alphabetical order (I try to be politically correct)
Maansi - Partner in crime, fellow movie lover, and we believe that we are the best dumb charades team around. Hah.
She (often with Namrata) comes up with half of the crazy plans that we put into action. Is extremely aware (political, economic stuff, AND gossip, so important), appreciates my sarcasm :) Most of the stupid plays and excellent films I have seen are thanks to her, and I firmly believe that I have introduced her to some of the better music around (definitely better than Metallica :P , and no Namrata, nothing can beat the Beatles)
AND - Elephants are NOT purple. This is wrong!!!
Manjusha - We were in the same school for 15 years, but I think we spoke for the first time in college. Unusually patient.
Can make Mona behave. Is excellent with small animals; my father thinks she is sensible (He is the only one to think so) :P I've spent half of my college years covering for her, while she was stirring up trouble somewhere. Is my constant shopping, bird-watching companion.
Mansi B - She's perhaps the only person in our 'clan' who can actually understand what the guy on CNBC is droning on about. Has real
work experience. Hates kids, is currently teaching brats at a school she says should be shut down. Watch out for her, she'll be one of those people you see on tv, commenting on financial...stuff or running a big financial consultancy or or, doing something big at Bombay Stock Exchange :) Does not like posing for pictures.
Monisha - Mona Darling! If there is one person who she is scared of, it is M ;) Mona, to a great extent, taught me to be
objective and non judgemental.
She is the one with whom I discuss everything - tv stars, sitcoms (we watch all the dumb ones), other people, food - everything! Is my ex-class companion, gaddar :P
Namrata - I could write a complete post about Namrata Patel (to be pronounced Pa'tell'). My first memory of her is of a hyperactive 11th std student with her hair braided into 2 pigtails. This alone would have made me do a double-take, as, for the rest of us, one of the high points of starting college was kissing pigtails/plaits goodbye. But let it never be said that Namrata did not do a job thoroughly....the braids were topped with a bandanna. A red bandanna.
You cannot help liking Namrata. She is utterly unique, high on life and a Beatles fan (This is the part where I confess I have never heard a Beatles song. I can almost see her jaw drop) Another thing about Namrata is that she is kind and exceedingly generous - with her time as well as her dabba :)
Dancing Phalanges!!
Sasneha - 'Rabbit' is what I call her. On the 'sensible thinking' scale, she's right up there with Bhambhani. She was the
financial secretary and/or the hospitality head of almost every club and event in
college. Very adept at organizing, calm and very, very good with dates and events, especially Indian History.
And in addition to all this, she is probably the only person who can actually handle Namrata :)
Snehal - Moonface, school buddy, we meet up
once in a while, but always know whats going on in each others boring lives :) Very
perceptive. Usually the mediator, and tries to keep me honest :) Named me 'Soup'! (Unfortunately, no individual picture of her. Send me one Sne.)
Vishal - Ah. Shouldn't even write about him, he hasn't read my blog yet :P Best bud since the last 5 years, he's always
around to calm me down when I am panicking, is amazingly sensible, level headed
and very, very focussed. Of course, my contribution to his mental well being is monumental - he wouldn't have lasted college if it hadn't been for my wise inputs and commentaries on so many, many issues in his life :P
Well, I will conclude my testimonial about these lovely people who, after my parents, have perhaps had the greatest influence on my behaviour - those who know me today think I am slightly er.. quirky/eccentric/crazy/talkative/childish (you must have seen me skipping, nodding my head to imaginary music or sticking out my tongue when I am bored) - now you know why.
So, this is a post about my 'bestest' friends - people I have known from school and college. Probably not of interest to those who don't know them, move on to the other posts :)
Alphabetical order (I try to be politically correct)
Maansi - Partner in crime, fellow movie lover, and we believe that we are the best dumb charades team around. Hah.
She (often with Namrata) comes up with half of the crazy plans that we put into action. Is extremely aware (political, economic stuff, AND gossip, so important), appreciates my sarcasm :) Most of the stupid plays and excellent films I have seen are thanks to her, and I firmly believe that I have introduced her to some of the better music around (definitely better than Metallica :P , and no Namrata, nothing can beat the Beatles)
AND - Elephants are NOT purple. This is wrong!!!
Manjusha - We were in the same school for 15 years, but I think we spoke for the first time in college. Unusually patient.
Can make Mona behave. Is excellent with small animals; my father thinks she is sensible (He is the only one to think so) :P I've spent half of my college years covering for her, while she was stirring up trouble somewhere. Is my constant shopping, bird-watching companion. Mansi B - She's perhaps the only person in our 'clan' who can actually understand what the guy on CNBC is droning on about. Has real
work experience. Hates kids, is currently teaching brats at a school she says should be shut down. Watch out for her, she'll be one of those people you see on tv, commenting on financial...stuff or running a big financial consultancy or or, doing something big at Bombay Stock Exchange :) Does not like posing for pictures.
Monisha - Mona Darling! If there is one person who she is scared of, it is M ;) Mona, to a great extent, taught me to be
objective and non judgemental.
She is the one with whom I discuss everything - tv stars, sitcoms (we watch all the dumb ones), other people, food - everything! Is my ex-class companion, gaddar :P
Namrata - I could write a complete post about Namrata Patel (to be pronounced Pa'tell'). My first memory of her is of a hyperactive 11th std student with her hair braided into 2 pigtails. This alone would have made me do a double-take, as, for the rest of us, one of the high points of starting college was kissing pigtails/plaits goodbye. But let it never be said that Namrata did not do a job thoroughly....the braids were topped with a bandanna. A red bandanna.
You cannot help liking Namrata. She is utterly unique, high on life and a Beatles fan (This is the part where I confess I have never heard a Beatles song. I can almost see her jaw drop) Another thing about Namrata is that she is kind and exceedingly generous - with her time as well as her dabba :)
Dancing Phalanges!!
Sasneha - 'Rabbit' is what I call her. On the 'sensible thinking' scale, she's right up there with Bhambhani. She was the
financial secretary and/or the hospitality head of almost every club and event in
college. Very adept at organizing, calm and very, very good with dates and events, especially Indian History.
And in addition to all this, she is probably the only person who can actually handle Namrata :)
Snehal - Moonface, school buddy, we meet up
once in a while, but always know whats going on in each others boring lives :) Very
perceptive. Usually the mediator, and tries to keep me honest :) Named me 'Soup'! (Unfortunately, no individual picture of her. Send me one Sne.)
Vishal - Ah. Shouldn't even write about him, he hasn't read my blog yet :P Best bud since the last 5 years, he's always
around to calm me down when I am panicking, is amazingly sensible, level headed
and very, very focussed. Of course, my contribution to his mental well being is monumental - he wouldn't have lasted college if it hadn't been for my wise inputs and commentaries on so many, many issues in his life :P
Well, I will conclude my testimonial about these lovely people who, after my parents, have perhaps had the greatest influence on my behaviour - those who know me today think I am slightly er.. quirky/eccentric/crazy/talkative/childish (you must have seen me skipping, nodding my head to imaginary music or sticking out my tongue when I am bored) - now you know why.
Sunday, July 12, 2009
It's all about Love
I’d written this one some time ago, but in light of the current debate over Section 377 of the Indian Penal Code, I guess its the right time to post it.
The first time I was told what ‘Gay’ meant, I was 12. What I did not understand was the hushed tone, the eye rolling, the shrug....I still don’t. So really, what is the big deal? You love someone, how does it matter who it is? Hey, if you do, then you do. So few are lucky to find true love, and love comes in many forms.
I was discussing the topic with someone once, who said ‘homosexuality is a perversion’. Pray, tell how? They justified it with this – “If homosexuality was ‘natural’, then why would there be two sexes-male and female, and not just one?” In that case I can ask, why all these varieties of flowers, so many animals and plants? Why don’t we just have roses and donkeys? Why bother with lotuses, marigolds, jasmine, tigers, lions, rabbits?
And WHAT is with the term natural?! Who are we to decide what is natural and what isn’t? Devdutt Pattanaik hits the nail on the head in The Pregnant King (That’s right, KING) –
"Careful of the word unnatural, it reeks of arrogance. You are assuming you know the boundaries of nature. You don't. There is more to life than your eyes can see. More than you can ever imagine. Nature comes from the mind of God. It is infinite. The finite human mind can never fathom it in totality."
Another thing I heard in a movie – ‘Nothing is unnatural really, whatever happens, in the end is happening within nature, and hence, natural and more importantly, possible.”
As we progress, our minds seem to regress. Religious scriptures are quoted by conservatives to justify their stand. But what everyone seems to firmly turn their eyes away from is the fact that every religious scripture is open to interpretation. Nothing is written in stone. Let’s be realistic. God did not beam down any of the books to earth – it was man who claimed to hear God and translated His teachings for the rest of us less enlightened mortals.
Over time, many such men decided they were entitled to interpret these scriptures, and the fools that we were, we allowed them to. Today, they decide what is right and wrong, sin and blasphemy. Which actions will take us to heaven or hell. Key here is the term decide. They don’t know for sure - no one does. Do heaven and hell even exist? Really, do you think we are going to float around sitting on clouds with harps, or stew in cauldrons, with little demons poking us with pitchforks?
Chew on this - None of us have seen God, spoken to Him. Perhaps in those who raise us, who teach us, in the kindness of strangers and, if we look hard enough, in ourselves, we may find Him.
My conclusion – I like to think there is someone out there who has got my back. I am going to assume this is someone who is understanding - if He really created us, he knows we are all goofy (FYI, I’m firmly with Darwin on evolution). More importantly, if there is a judgement day (which would reinforce the concept of heaven and hell, which I really, really don’t believe in) He really isn’t going to ask us who we loved. I think it will be our other actions on earth – kindness, honesty, courage - that are going to count.
P.S: For those concerned Indian citizens who have been greatly traumatized about the legalization of homosexuality and who claim that it will ‘corrupt’ the great Indian culture – wake up and smell the garbage : dowry, child marriage, cruelty towards women and senior citizens, child labour, illiteracy, eve teasing (ugh!), demolition of religious buildings by politicians, corruption, defacing of monuments, lack of general civic sense - spitting on streets, littering – Really? What are your priorities? Do you truly love your country? Deal with these then.
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Things to do before I die
Travel alone - To Italy - Rome, Florence, Amalfi Coast; Guernsey, Machu Picchu - Peru, Iran, Japan, Angkor Wat - Cambodia, France(countryside) {Paris Done!}, Wales {Done}, Turkey, Pakistan, Moscow, Cuba, Central Asia. Leh-laddakh, North-East India.
In fact, to visit every nook and corner of my country
To stand alone at the Stonehenge.
{Done!}To explore the ruins of Takshila and Nalanda
To plant a banyan and a mango tree. Climb a tree.
Bungee Jump (Not at crowded place. Preferably some nice, high, isolated spot :D )
Send Dad on his dream trip to Finland, get mom her dream home in Ooty. Send them both on a cruise
Study Abroad
Get a tattoo
Read all the books I wanted to, meant to, have to, have bought to
Tango! Twist! Jive! Salsa!!!
Dance in a disco without being self conscious
Open a bookstore (small one -Serendipity- wooden floors, glass door with a bell that rings when it opens, latticed windows)
Get a dog. Name him Jack.
Learn to swim properly (and not just "I can save myself, if I have to")
In spite of 2 sessions(almost 30 classes) of driving, don't know how to start a car. Once that's done for me, I can drive (Big Deal). So - Learn how to start a car, drive, park...the whole nine yards
Learn how to ride a motorcycle. Then buy a Harley, go to Laddakh and vroooooooom-------!!!
Ride a horse in a wild open field in the middle of nowhere
Learn a foreign language
Learn how to play the Cello
Finish learning Bharatnatyam
Make a difference in at least one child's life
To earn enough for all of the above!
Get a job i can't wait to get to every morning
Play football in the rain
Scream myself hoarse cheering for India while watching a live India vs Pakistan match
Watch a live game of Federer vs Nadal (Which Federer wins), talk to Federer, get his autograph then die and go to heaven
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